New Year, Old Delusional List of Things to Accomplish

Well it's good to know that i only got 3 things done in the last year, cause hey, 3 is better than 0... though 10 would have been even more so... so here it is again, now at 7. 7 things to do before the end of the year! Kinda hoping I at least get through one thing eh?

Learn to draw - some people say that practice makes perfect. Well, I've been attempting to draw the same stupid cake design for the past few weeks to no avail. (I'm a nerd, I like to design things that I'll end up eating in tears) It still looks horrible. Depressingly horrible. In some instances, it appears to be a foot with a dying bouquet of flowers on top. I'm sure if I could even glean some basic sense in lines and perception and what not, I may be able to create some decent design to work off of. 

Learn to play the guitar - even if it's just a couple of chords and figuring out that darned TAB, it'd be nice to know what that crazy 6 stringed thing is all about. And, isn't it like the foundation of every metro/emo/bohemian to know how to play the guitar? Luckily the roomie has one so I don't need to make a possibly regrettable purchase. (I also realized that being good at Guitar Hero does not make me good at a real guitar.... *sigh)

Find a job - oh how I really need one!! With HEALTH BENEFITS for sure! (Not really helping my case by not really actively throwing my resume out there)

Get into shape - or at some semblance of a shape that's not a pear or apple. It's on everyone's list so might as well be here.

Do some yoga classes - never been but for some reason I own a yoga mat. What does that say about my sloth?

Learn to dance - seems like I'm leaning towards ballet as it would maybe mix well with the yoga, though I do have thoughts of grandeur to become the next Ginger Rogers so maybe some crazy ballroom lessons... but I think I'd have to find a partner for that. I've never been one for legit dancing. Except for that time (check it, 3 times) that my mother sent me to Cotillion dance classes where I learned how to waltz, jitterbug and macarena before that crazy macarena song came out. I am a macarena queen.

Explore NYC - it's funny how I hear from people that have lived here for a long time that they haven't gone to certain places in the city. I don't want to be one of those. I met a sweet elderly man once who every Saturday with his wife would pick a spot on a map of New York City and then they'd go there. Wander the day away. He joked that he couldn't remember half the things he saw or tried in those place, but he was happy to have gone and known that "hey, that's what Governor's Island looks like."

Clean the apartment - It seems trivial, but who has seriously done a DEEP clean of their place? Taken a whole weekend and scrubbed, swept, aired out the entire place? Not to mention the things that uselessly pile up everywhere. I know there are some posters that just sit waiting to be chucked. And those acres of dresses that I keep that I should let go of.

Speed Date - Yes, that's right. Speed Date. But not just any old speed dating. Speed dating where I'll create a ridiculous cover story then attempt to alienate every sketchy older man who decided that this was the place to pick up a chick. I'd love to really be in a relationship, but I'm gonna use this opportunity to be the worst possible version of myself. What can that be? Any suggestions? Maybe I'll find my ballroom dance partner. heh heh.

Read the Bible - seems lame to say this, but it'd be nice to read it cover to cover without giving up and stashing it away in my bookcase next to all my film books. Come to think of it, I should probably re-read some of those. I'm not a very religious person, though I am Catholic, so it seems like the right time to get back into something that I was once fully committed to.

Tofurkey is such a liar

I'm all game for making tofu into something it's not. A brick, replica of an adobe pueblo, animal shapes. But I must say, tofurkey was the biggest disappointment ever. Not only what I hoping for a giant turkey shaped piece of tofu, but I thought, how funny would that be that I served that and people would be too polite to point out it tasted really weird. Like tofu weird.

No. I was wrong.

Don't know how long ago it was. But I do remember the sharp pang of WTF as I walked around the grocery store looking to make the funniest dinner gag ever. What I found was a cube sized box, and what I found inside the box looked like this:

nestling it in a bed of veggies doesn't make it anymore appealing

That's not tofurkey! What is that?! what's in that?! It's like some giant alien egg that'll end up popping out of your chest later.

"omg it was the tofurkey!"

Anyways, disappointed that it didn't actually look like this fake turkey, but it did taste pretty awesome.

not sure what's happening with that stuffing

What other things do you think tofu could be made into? Tobeef? Tofish, tofeal?